Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Coolest part about starting a new job is the immunity to disease you get for 3 months till you get sick days.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

This site could use some more people who like to argue about literally anything.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

The government even made aliens boring.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,539

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

People in 1999 were using the Internet as an escape from reality. People today are using reality as an escape from the Internet.

Shared recently on Slack:

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

Trending via X:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Just landed via Telegram:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Just landed via Discord:

I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If only my bank balance was as high as my daily calorie intake.

Seen just now on Threads:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Going viral on Telegram:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Funny Coca Cola quotes

Funny Coca Cola quotes bring a fizz of laughter and refresh your day like a cold soda on a sunny afternoon 🥤😄. Whether you’re a cola lover or just enjoy a good chuckle, these witty lines pop with flavor and sparkle with humor ✨😂. Get ready to sip on some bubbly fun and share a smile with every bubbly word! 🍾😜

New funny Coca Cola quotes 👇

All funny Coca Cola quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on Facebook this month:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

15 shares on TikTok this month:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

20 shares on TikTok this month:

When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

You can’t keep running away from your problems, you’re getting older and your kids are getting faster.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m at the age when riding around town, I say, “When did they build that?”

25 shares on WeChat this month:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

My brain has too many tabs open.

62 shares on WeChat this month:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Them: Good morning! Me: Where?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Every Friday, I’m like, “This weekend I’m getting my life together,” and then… I don’t.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I learned about the concept of networking, I knew I was going to have to do everything alone and do it the hard way.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Please hesitate to reach out.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,688

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I never give second chances, just 10 and then goodbye.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I know Jesus was a carpenter, but I think he would’ve been a better plumber, you know, with the water thing.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Ninety percent of my new follows are beautiful women, which tells me one thing: I’ve still got it!

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I don’t think I’d get married again, but I would like to annoy someone until one of us is dead.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Hey, can I get an ETA on that “this too shall pass”?

Just landed via Instagram:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Breaking via X:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

Just shared via WeChat:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I get it, laundry, no one is doing me either.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I think I’ll just let my jazz hands speak for themselves.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Spotted on Facebook:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Trending via Messenger:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴