Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately for everyone, I will keep doing whatever I want.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Almonds are a scam. They are wood. You are eating wood.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Resting bitch face saves me from so many conversations I don’t want to be part of.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,401

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If Halloween is over, then why am I still scared?

Trending via Instagram:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Trending via YouTube:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

Spotted on Discord:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

Live now on Instagram:

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Shared recently on Instagram:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Trending via Threads:

Smash Mouth was so right, the years really do start coming and they don’t stop coming.

Trending via X:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

Funny derogatory quotes

Funny derogatory quotes bring a cheeky twist to roasting friends and foes alike 😜🔥 Perfect for lighthearted burns that make everyone laugh without crossing the line 😂💥 Whether you’re aiming for clever jabs or playful insults, these witty lines add spice to any conversation 🌶️💬 Ready to up your banter game and leave them laughing? Let’s dive into some hilariously savage vibes! 😎✨

New funny derogatory quotes 👇

All funny derogatory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Messenger this month:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

84 shares on X this month:

When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

34 shares on YouTube this month:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Watching true crime documentaries so I can learn from their mistakes.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not again. I mean good morning.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

78 shares on X this month:

The best thing about the internet is that you’re never the dumbest one here.

50 shares on Slack this month:

Within a week, we’ve had a major jewel heist, a mafia-involved poker ring, and sports gambling corruption. We’re living in the 1920s.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever has my voodoo doll, if you could take some stuffing out of the midsection and give it a little forehead kiss, that would be great.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you busy tomorrow?” My dear, that entirely depends on the rest of the information you’re about to give me.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,570

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Dancing alone in your home is its own kind of therapy.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Hanging out with your parents as an adult is so interesting, cause it’s like, “Oh, so that’s why I’m like this.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Asian girl at tech company: Wow, everyone here is so friendly.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

I want to be rich enough where I’m not offended by the price of beef jerky.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Telegram:

Farting, but with eye contact.

Spotted on Instagram:

Why are so many people going everywhere whenever I have to go anywhere?

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Just landed via TikTok:

Most people prefer lies. The truth just hits them like a WiFi outage, and then they just stand there, confused and buffering.

Just shared via Twitch:

I put my music on shuffle then get mad when it doesn’t play the song I want.

Trending via Reddit:

Facebook friends are like pens. You may have 150, but only 5 are writing.

Spotted on TikTok:

I couldn’t work at a zoo. I’d have a penguin in my car by the end of the shift.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m never early… unless we’re talking about the airport.

Shared recently on Slack:

Me, on New Year’s Eve: I think instead of kissing at midnight, I’m just going to go outside and scream.

Trending via Facebook:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

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