Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Ozzy Osbourne has mumbled through entire sentences, and I still understood him better than most of my exes.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Human hibernation should be a thing.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

“You look tired!” Bro, I want to stop existing.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

My superpower is giving you the middle finger using my eyes only.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,810

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

Going viral on Instagram:

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Making waves on TikTok:

I’ve left my past behind me, so if I owe you money, sorry, I’ve left it behind me.

Spotted on Threads:

We used to pass notes in class like spies. Folded like origami. Deep like Shakespeare.

Trending via Twitch:

I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Just landed via Facebook:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Immediately de-escalating an international conflict by posting an angry looking selfie with the caption “Come on, guys.”

Seen just now on TikTok:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a second.

Going viral on YouTube:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Funny gift card quotes

Funny gift card quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 🎉 and personality 🎭 to a simple present. Whether you’re aiming to crack a smile 😄 or spark a giggle 🤭, these witty one-liners make every gift card unforgettable. Ready to turn a small gesture into a big laugh? Let’s dive into the world of clever, cheeky, and downright hilarious sayings! 🎁😂

New funny gift card quotes 👇

All funny gift card quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

Gaslighting myself into thinking I’m in a good mood.

37 shares on Discord this month:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

32 shares on YouTube this month:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

The first people who called chocolate a vegetable are the real heroes.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

Saw an article on “100 things to do before you die.” Was surprised Call 911 didn’t make the list.

40 shares on YouTube this month:

Avocado is just green butter.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If my cats are going to insist upon me getting up early, they’re going to have to learn how to make coffee.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Cancel culture has been canceled.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

People will make you sad but cheese will always make you happy. The choice is simple.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,947

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

My favorite dinner is the one made by someone else.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I personally feel like I have what it takes to become a fossil.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Lifting my wife’s wedding veil and finding out she’s Darth Maul.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

“New password cannot be your old password” makes me so mad.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Y’all smell that? A beautiful day that the Lord has made.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Life is so draining, you fix one problem, here come 12 more.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

Making waves on Facebook:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

Making waves on Slack:

What is it called when you’re smart but everything you do is freaking stupid?

Seen just now on Instagram:

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

Trending via Threads:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Trending via Reddit:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Spotted on WeChat:

Limiting my replies to introverts, wizards, freaks and vampires only.

Broadcasted on Threads:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴