Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

God knew I’d be too powerful if He made me not annoying to women.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I used to be cool, but now I just can’t wait to get on the couch by 7 p.m., in my pajamas, with a quilted blanket.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

Imagine if all the money spent on AI was spent on trains.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,551

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.

Making waves on Twitch:

Summer: 10 minutes outside, 10 hours in front of the AC.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

A large group of people is called an “eww, no thank you”

Just landed via Instagram:

I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Making waves on Messenger:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Trending via TikTok:

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

Funny high score quotes

Funny high score quotes are the ultimate way to celebrate those epic gaming wins 🎮🏆 and hilarious fails 😂🔥. Whether you’re crushing levels or just having a blast, these witty lines add extra flair to your leaderboard legends 🌟👾. Ready to level up your humor game? Let’s dive into some chuckle-worthy quotes that make every score feel like a victory dance 🎉💥!

New funny high score quotes 👇

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

0

2 months ago

beat, blood, blood pressure, brag, competition, high, high score, humor, joke, just, machine, pressure, score
Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

0

2 months ago

bad, bad news, cholesterol, diet, good, good news, health, high, high score, humor, i, irony, news, score, time, today, wellness
Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

0

2 months ago

achievement, bathroom, fitness, high, high score, humor, joke, new, scale, score, weight

All funny high score quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Telegram this month:

Does anyone know if there’s a career in being a piece of shit?

23 shares on Messenger this month:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

I finally used a screw from the random screw collection I’ve been accumulating for 25 years, and I’ve never felt so alive.

92 shares on Discord this month:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

56 shares on Messenger this month:

Songs discovered from movies are usually a masterpiece.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

Please stop assuming that too many em dashes mean AI written. Some of us are producing grammatically incoherent work the honest way!

21 shares on Pinterest this month:

Coffee, because I don’t have time for a manslaughter charge.

25 shares on X this month:

A big shout-out to all the beekeepers. Our unstung heroes.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

A social media post so confusing you turn your music down to read it.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to clarify that what I publish on social media does not define me as a person; I am worse.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,644

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

My favorite part about talking to my teens is when they give me direct eye contact, listen intently, nod understandingly and then do the exact opposite of what I just said.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

If my fingers don’t motion like scissors snipping when I ask for a haircut at the salon, how will they know what I mean?

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Trending via Twitch:

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

Shared recently on YouTube:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Making waves on Discord:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Don’t worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Turns out, college is all about forming unspoken, powerful bonds with people you talk to twice.

Going bananas on Slack:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Making waves on Slack:

If you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia, you risk getting stoned.

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