Commentary:
Sounds like your coffee needs an upgrade if Mondays are your best stories 🤪☕
5670 Funny i quotes
The Velvet Underground probably wouldn’t have been so influential if I was at their shows with a giant magnet and pulled their guitars out of their hands.
Commentary:
Guess that’s one way to create an *unplugged* performance! 🔌😄🎸
I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.
Commentary:
Wow, who knew the key to wisdom was sifting through cat memes and shower thoughts? 😂🔍🐱
Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.
Commentary:
Lettuce be real, this is a "toasty" compliment! 🍔❤️
When it gets past my bedtime, I get so scared.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've got a bedtime boogeyman 😱😂 #SleepyScaries 😴👻
I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.
Commentary:
Can’t decide if that’s funny or just true 🤔😂
Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.
Commentary:
When he's around, my brain's on vacation mode! 🏖️🧠😜
Hey, I’ve been thinking, and I think you should think for me.
Commentary:
Brain outsourced, thinking power restored! 🤔🔄🧠
I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.
Commentary:
Detecting evil one profile pic at a time—call me Instagran! 😈📸🔍
I highly recommend getting yourself a “How can I help” partner and not a “You will be fine” partner.
Commentary:
Sounds like a "How can I help" partner is the real MVP, while the "You'll be fine" partner is just there for moral support and snacks 😂🤷♂️🍕