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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

You think you’re cool and then you see a video of yourself running.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me, and I’m not even paying attention.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Carrying a baby for nine months and then naming it Chet is insane.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

“Hope you’re enjoying the sunshine!” No, I’m at a desk reading your email.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,690

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Snapchat:

If you’re not dropping it like it’s hot, then what the hell are you doing?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

The only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead.

Making waves on YouTube:

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Bowling: The most fun you can have wearing someone else’s shoes.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Biting the heads off all these gingerbread men if you wanna swing by.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m gonna turn all this pain into something beautiful, like a poorly timed joke that makes everyone feel weird.

Shared recently on Slack:

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Just shared via TikTok:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

Going viral on TikTok:

Rudolph, with your nose so bright, help me find my phone tonight.

Funny machines quotes

Funny machines quotes 🤖🔧 bring a delightful twist to the world of gadgets and gizmos! Whether it’s about quirky robots, stubborn printers, or coffee makers with attitude ☕️😂, these witty lines turn everyday tech frustrations into laugh-out-loud moments. Ready to smile at the silly side of machines? Let’s dive into some humor that gears up your day with pure fun! 😄⚙️

New funny machines quotes 👇

All funny machines quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on TikTok this month:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

I knew I had issues when motivational speakers started to irritate me.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

Asking “how’s the job hunt going?” is a lot like asking “did you come?” I promise you, you’d hear if there was any success.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

If I ever win the lottery and decide to invest in a billboard company, I won’t tell anyone; but there will be signs.

74 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Ok, I cheated in school, but I did it the hard way and without AI.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

Another day of explaining to mom that New York is big and the footage she saw wasn’t shot on my street.

71 shares on Discord this month:

If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

51 shares on Discord this month:

Relationship Status: just tried to pet my dog and he turned his head so I pretended I was reaching for a leaf that was next to him.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

82 shares on Pinterest this month:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The weather’s got more mood swings than a reality show reunion.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a little ironic when you consider that the Internet was invented to save time.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear Snapchat memory, that’s not my friend anymore.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Rappers be making you feel guilty for no reason at all: “You was in the house eating dinner while I was in the streets hungry”. Like my fault, bro.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

HR is giving me a hard time because I’ve been starting all my work emails with “Dearly Beloved”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,449

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Say what you want about online meetings, but there are few things more liberating than attending a disciplinary hearing naked from the waist down.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Laziness is the art to rest before one gets tired.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

You should get a pension for having to go to school for so many years.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

I did some exercise in 2010, I should be good for another few years.

Just shared via YouTube:

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

Trending via Pinterest:

Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Seen just now on Discord:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

Trending via WeChat:

I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The way time stretches between the moment you put your hands under the air dryer and the realization it is in fact a paper towel dispenser.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Every time I see a couple riding a tandem bike, I try to figure out which one of them is pissed about it.

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