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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

And is this “year-end bonus” in the room with us right now?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,726

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

The crematorium is my last hope for a hot body.

Breaking via X:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you either have a naked window neighbor or you are the naked window neighbor.

Spotted on WeChat:

There’s no-one who can get more drunk on power than the admin of a village Facebook group.

Shared recently on Messenger:

You ran a half marathon? That’s really cool, I’ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.

Spreading quickly via X:

“You’re just mad my gut microbiome is way more diverse and complex than yours.”

Just landed via X:

I was actually doing so well until your email found me.

Broadcasted on Slack:

If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

Spotted on Telegram:

Whoever allowed me to become an adult needs to be fired.

Just landed via Instagram:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Trending via X:

I’m in a long-distance relationship with the stars.

Home » Funny Phone Usage Quotes

Funny phone usage quotes

Funny phone usage quotes📱😂 bring a hilarious twist to our screen time habits! Whether you’re addicted to scrolling or guilty of texting mishaps, these witty lines capture the silly side of our phone obsession. Get ready to LOL 🤣 and relate as you dive into the quirks of modern tech life—because sometimes, all you need is a good laugh with your favorite device in hand! 📲✨

New funny phone usage quotes 👇

All funny phone usage quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

68 shares on Twitch this month:

The only team building exercise we had when I started working was called “Happy Hour.”

56 shares on WeChat this month:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

88 shares on Slack this month:

TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I think they’ve made more Kung-Fu Panda movies in the last 20 years than they’ve made actual pandas.

10 shares on Reddit this month:

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal but had no milk, so I used ice cream.

24 shares on Slack this month:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Presumably, if you had a time machine, you could just kill young adult Hitler. The baby part seems gratuitous.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,951

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Having a job ruined my life.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Another Monday that no one asked for.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Nighty night! Don’t let the horror of existence bite.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I need a six-month vacation twice a year.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Rap fell off when literacy stopped being a requirement.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Having to confirm your past purchases over the phone with your bank’s fraud department is a truly harrowing moment of self-examination for chronic little treat buyers.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

A two-step guide to warning someone not to hit their head: 1. Wait until they’ve hit their head. 2. Say “Ooh, mind your head!”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Seen just now on Threads:

You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

Trending via Facebook:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.

Shared recently on Threads:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

Spotted on Slack:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Just landed via Instagram:

Age range on my dating app set to 40+. Y’all fighting over grapes while I’m drinking wine.

Trending via X:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Does running actually get easier if you do it a lot, or is it that you just get more masochistic?

Trending via LinkedIn:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

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