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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

If rich people aren’t upset after an election, then we have failed.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Wow, this person is full of shit. Oh, I’m on my own page.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,346

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

Just shared via Reddit:

Welcome to your 50s, you now take supplements to help your memory, but you can’t remember if you took them today.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

Freshly posted on Discord:

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Just landed via Twitch:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Spotted on Slack:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Live now on Pinterest:

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

Funny stress management quotes

Funny stress management quotes are the perfect remedy to lighten your mood and tackle tension with a smile 😄✨. When life gets overwhelming, a little humor can turn stress into giggles and help you breathe easier 🌈💆‍♂️. Ready to laugh your worries away? Let’s dive into some witty wisdom that makes stress feel a little less serious and a lot more fun! 🎉😂

New funny stress management quotes 👇

All funny stress management quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Wish I could just go back to eating cookies and not knowing what day it was.

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

98 shares on Reddit this month:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

47 shares on Threads this month:

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

82 shares on Discord this month:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

I was feeling kinda lonely this morning so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car so people would wave at me.

47 shares on Instagram this month:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

20 shares on Discord this month:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I named my eraser Confidence because it gets smaller after every mistake I make.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I always need to pee, but it’s just because my heart is so big it pushes on my bladder.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Just came back from my walk, and I was right about everything.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice-cream.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,723

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Self-care is smoking a solo blunt with music.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

You don’t need a therapist, you need an exorcist.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

The problem is that younger me didn’t account for the fact that there’d be an older me.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Trending via WeChat:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.

Going viral on Discord:

Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Spotted on Reddit:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Just shared via Discord:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Breaking via Twitch:

Some days you’re the bat, some days you’re the ball.

Seen just now on Slack:

They’re selling me on Temu tomorrow.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

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