Commentary:
"Remember, folks, trust is like a Snapchat photo – it disappears quickly! 📸😂 Let's play it safe and keep those nudes where they belong – in the vault! 🔒😜"
93 Funny trust quotes
My wife trusts me with a joint bank account but when I’m loading the dishwasher she always walks in the kitchen “to get something.”
Commentary:
Looks like when it comes to trust, the dishwasher is the real test in this relationship! 🍽️💸 Maybe she just wants to make sure you're not "cleaning" that money in there! 😄 #MarriageMysteries
“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.
Commentary:
Looks like your cat's got some real estate ambitions! 🐱💼 Better watch out before he starts investing in catnip futures and litter box condos. 😂 #Catpreneurship
I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.
Commentary:
"I mean, who can really rely on a flimsy little handle to safeguard a precious cargo like cake? 🎂🚫 Better tote that sweet treat with enough caution to make Fort Knox security jealous! 🔒😅 #HandleWithExtremeCare"
You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.
Commentary:
"Trust me, I'm like a vault when it comes to keeping your secrets. But as for who I share them with… well, let's just say I've been known to spill the tea! 🤐🔒☕️ #SecretsSafewithMeNotSoMuch"
If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.
Commentary:
"Words of wisdom: Never go clothes shopping when you're naked… unless you want to see some alarmed store clerks and potentially end up on a reality show 🛒👗😱 #FashionEmergency"
If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.
Commentary:
"If dogs could talk, it would be a whole new level of drama at the dog park! 🐶🗣️🤥 Just imagine the tall tales your furry friend might come up with! Better hide those socks before they spill the beans about who the real sock thief is 😉🧦"
If you’re not in my circle of trust, you’re probably in my triangle of suspicion or rhombus of doubt.
Commentary:
"Ah, the geometric gossip of trust issues! 🤔 If you're not in the inner sanctum, you might find yourself wandering in the wilderness of suspicion shapes. 🔺🔲 Better start practicing your angles if you want to be part of the circle! 😉"
Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.
Commentary:
"Who needs love when you have the deliciously pungent bond between garlic and bread? That's a marriage that will never crumble… just like a perfectly toasted garlic bread! 🍞❤️🧄 #RelationshipGoals"
Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.
Commentary:
"Ex's be like 'I gave you everything'. Yeah, trust issues. 🙄 Sounds like they're giving everything except honesty and loyalty! 😂 #EpicFail"