Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Please take your Apple Watch off if you are wearing a dress or formal attire. You look like a spy kid.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

May I please come over and curl up in your lap like a cat?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I’ve done the math: If the month had 10 days, I would get by with my money.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,714

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Life is like bread. It gets hard at some point.

Seen just now on X:

When exactly does wisdom kick in? I feel like I’m just getting older.

Making waves on WeChat:

The dumbest thing about YouTube ads is how they seem to think that I’m a moron.

Just landed via YouTube:

Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.

Seen just now on Discord:

Addicted to bad posture. Omggg, why is it so comfortable to give yourself scoliosis?

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

Having a crush on someone as an adult feels like a humiliation ritual.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Falling for someone as an adult really is just nature's way of reminding us we never outgrew the awkward teenage phase 🤦‍♀️❤️

adult, awkwardness, crush, dating, feels, having, humiliation, love, ritual, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

0

2 months ago

balance, cry, crying, desk, finding, healthy, humor, multitasking, relief, shower, stress, stress relief, time, work life, work-life balance
Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.

0

2 months ago

feel, humor, joke, math, me, most, numb, number, pun, puns, wordplay
That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

0

2 months ago

again, blink, blues, feeling, Friday, frustration, humor, lapse, Monday, Monday blues, once, relatable, time, time lapse, weekend, workweek
Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

0

2 months ago

career, carefree, casual, humor, motivation, never, playful, snack, snacks, sunshine
My favourite animal is me when I have money.

0

5 months ago

animal, favorite, favourite, humor, i, me, money, self-love, wealth
That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

0

2 months ago

day, delivery, every, household, humor, living, living situation, package, quirky, roommate, situation, unemployed

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Pinterest this month:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

21 shares on Threads this month:

For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.

88 shares on Slack this month:

How come all the single people don’t need no one, and all the married ones need two?

31 shares on TikTok this month:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

21 shares on Slack this month:

Before I started my own business, I would suffer from anxiety on Sunday nights. But now that I run my own business, I have anxiety every night.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

God creating the duck: waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo.

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

75 shares on X this month:

Please congratulate me on my cool new position! It is the fetal position; I will be in it for a while.

76 shares on WeChat this month:

In a parallel universe, I go to bed early and wake up fresh and unstoppable.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

When the devil couldn’t reach me, he made my brain my biggest enemy.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I hate when I’m trying to spell a word, and my phone can’t do it either.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

If you’re not dropping it like it’s hot, then what the hell are you doing?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Animals are 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

So I think the mammals have now ravaged this planet long enough. It’s time for the reptiles to take over again.

Going viral on Instagram:

Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Spotted on Threads:

Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

Seen just now on Facebook:

70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.

Just landed via Messenger:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Nighttime is when I remember that one weird thing I said in 6th grade, and feel bad about it forever.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

Live now on Messenger:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

Just shared via YouTube:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Can everyone log off? I need some time alone right now.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Having a crush on someone as an adult feels like a humiliation ritual.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

My favourite animal is me when I have money.

That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨