Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Being naked with shoes on feels more naked than being totally naked.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

The night before a day off is more satisfying than the actual day off.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,592

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

Shared recently on X:

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

Spotted on Slack:

I’m an adult in the same way that Katy Perry is an astronaut.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Due to not wanting to, I will not be.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Making waves on WeChat:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Canadian Thanksgiving isn’t the same day as Thanksgiving in the US because Canadians already put gravy on everything every day.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The answer is always no, I did not get enough sleep.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

I wish I had the determination of my wife, who’s still flipping through radio stations as we pull into our driveway.

Funny quote about persistence, showing a playful wife endlessly searching radio stations.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Your wife's dedication is unmatched! 🚗🎶 She won't let a driveway stop her from finding THE perfect song! 😄🙌"

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on WeChat this month:

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Sorry for texting back instantly. My phone is in my hand, I’m mature, and I like you.

96 shares on WeChat this month:

If parallel universe exist, I hope the other me is doing well.

51 shares on YouTube this month:

Dear music, thanks!

98 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

100 shares on Instagram this month:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this cigarette just now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Money does not buy happiness, but it’s better to cry in a sports car than on a bicycle.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If only my bank balance was as high as my daily calorie intake.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

May the Force be with you… especially in Monday meetings.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Pursuing an academic career is like thinking the stripper loves you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,562

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

You could waterboard pretty much any embarrassing information out of me. I’m very waterboardable.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I find that age is just a number, and the older you get, the number you get.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

I predict the next world war will be artificial intelligence versus genuine stupidity.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

Going viral on Facebook:

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

Just landed via YouTube:

Did you know on the Canary Islands there is not one canary? And on the Virgin Isles? Same thing – not one canary there either!

Just shared via Snapchat:

If I were a higher power, and people were doing evil in my name, I’d probably stop it … but that’s just me.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Shared recently on Threads:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

In these difficult times, it’s important to remember that cheese exists.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Live now on Slack:

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴