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Commentary:
"Looks like those winter layers have melted away just in time for spring… to reveal some fresh spring rolls! 🌸🍣 Who needs abs when you can have delicious rolls instead? 😂 #SpringBodyGoals"

diet, fat, food, gone, humor, i, joke, roll, rolls, spring, winter

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Real yearners know yearning is not actually fun.

0

4 months ago

actually, fun, humor, irony, know, real, yearner, yearning
They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

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2 months ago

bed, constant, constant roll, funny idea, gas, gas station, hotdog, humor, idea, invention, over, roll, rolls, should, station, tanning, tanning bed
God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

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2 months ago

animals, cat, eat, flakes, food, frosted, Frosted Flakes, God, going, humor, invention, likes, okay, tiger
Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

0

2 months ago

design, engineer, every, evil, eyes, humor, irony, just, led, red, red LED, robot, scenario, technology
Petition to add fitted sheet folding to the olympics.

0

2 months ago

activity, fitted, fitted sheet, folding, home, home activity, household, household task, humor, Olympics, petition, sheet, task
Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

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2 months ago

alcohol, always, breathe, drink, hear, humor, i, needs, revive, sarcasm, want, wine

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on YouTube this month:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

88 shares on Twitch this month:

There are rumors that someone came down the chimney last night. This is preposterous. I would have lost my mind.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

28 shares on Telegram this month:

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t understand the concept of “the man of your dreams”. Every time my wife wakes up after dreaming about me, she is really pissed off about something dream me did.

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Called in telepathically this morning, so they know I’m thinking of them.

85 shares on Messenger this month:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

89 shares on Slack this month:

I miss the days when you could simply end a phone call by slamming the receiver down angrily.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Just shared via Discord:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Some people feel like unpaid actors in my sitcom called “What Fresh Chaos Is This?”

Just landed via Facebook:

Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

Going bananas on Threads:

What’s a girl gotta do to feel a dopamine high around here?

Going viral on WeChat:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

Live now on Instagram:

Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

Trending via Snapchat:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

Just shared via TikTok:

Attention: will the owner of a small blue planet with tectonic plates please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Finally my winter fat has gone. I now have spring rolls.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Real yearners know yearning is not actually fun.

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Petition to add fitted sheet folding to the olympics.

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨