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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

No, it’s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m retired. I was tired yesterday and I’m tired again today.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

We’re limited only by our imagination and some federal agencies.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Instead of writing letters, let’s wait a week before texting each other back so it still feels like it.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Making waves on Reddit:

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body is that I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Shared recently on Slack:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

Going viral on YouTube:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

What if babies had two umbilical cords and if you cut the wrong one, it exploded?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Tested positive for being single af

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I’d trust a groundhog over a weatherman any day.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I miss the days when you could simply end a phone call by slamming the receiver down angrily.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

From now on, I’m gonna tell guests that I made my house especially messy just for their visit. It was hard, but I got it done.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Outlook just asked me if I’m “enjoying” Microsoft Outlook. As if it’s not the Torment Portal.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Trending via Discord:

Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isn’t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

Trending via Snapchat:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Spreading quickly via X:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

Spotted on Twitch:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Just landed via Facebook:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

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