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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If love is the answer then what was the question?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Hey, man, we’re worshiping a false god later. If you wanna pull up.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

I will restart the entire song if you talk over my favorite part.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

I don’t understand why my cooking was garbage. I did everything right. I drank wine while I cooked. I had a hand towel over my shoulder. Literally everything right.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

What is your favorite movie where Tom Cruise runs really fast?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,510

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

I wouldn’t walk 500 miles, and then walk 500 more.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Trending via Telegram:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

Just shared via WeChat:

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Breaking via Twitch:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Making waves on Telegram:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

Spotted on Discord:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Live now on Discord:

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

18 Funny caution quotes

More funny caution quotes 👇

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

0

2 months ago

activity, back, buddy, came, careful, caution, fun, fun activity, humor, joke, man, never, risk, trampoline
The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

0

2 months ago

advice, caution, humor, kids, nicely, notice, parenting, playing, thing, together, worst
Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

0

2 months ago

advice, anything, caution, day, decision making, explain, humor, lesson, life, life lesson, paramedic, want, wisdom
Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

0

2 months ago

being, caution, celebrity, dicaprio, driving, humor, leonardo, Leonardo DiCaprio, limit, school, school zone, speed, speed limit, zone
With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

0

2 months ago

caution, certainty, douche, great, humor, irony, power, responsibility, right, transformation, turn
If she says “you are my world” remember there are other planets. Stay alert, kings!

0

2 months ago

advice, alert, caution, humor, kings, planet, relationship, remember, stay, stay alert, world
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

0

2 months ago

book, careful, caution, death, die, health, health book, humor, irony, life, misprint, reading
It’s Monday, proceed with caution.

0

3 months ago

caution, humor, Monday, motivation, warning, weekday, workday

For even more funny caution quotes, hit next 👇

All funny caution quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I admire how time manages to quickly heal wounds but takes forever to remove awkward tan lines.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

60 shares on Messenger this month:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

35 shares on Telegram this month:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Can’t believe penguins have to publish all those books with their tiny hands.

11 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m not going to die because of an accident. Nor because of an illness. But from small talk. Someone will say one boring sentence too many and I’ll drop dead.

32 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not only is Santa not real, there are also no horny singles in your area wanting to meet you.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

I should have been a Librarian, my favorite thing to do is telling people to shut up.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

They should invent a good thing that happens.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

The Bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Spell your crush’s name backwards, mine is yenom.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I only squeak when I’m squoken to.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Always be kind. You never know who has a pool.

Spotted on Twitch:

Not now, kitten. Mommy’s destroying and betraying herself for nothing.

Making waves on Discord:

Listen to your body? The body that craves a lethal amount of Kinder Bueno?

Just landed via Facebook:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Shared recently on Threads:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Spotted on Reddit:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Making waves on Facebook:

Not to brag, but I just walked upstairs and remembered why.

Activity Log ✨

18 Funny caution quotes

More funny caution quotes 👇

All funny caution quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨