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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

My ideal workday would be from 9:00 AM to 9:07 AM

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Why can’t people be tested like watermelons? You tap them on the head and find out whether they are normal or bad.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

10 minutes ago

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Trending via Discord:

I only drink when I people.

Seen just now on Discord:

If you love someone be brave enough to tell them. Otherwise be brave enough to watch them dating someone else.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Making waves on Twitch:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Going viral on Instagram:

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.

Trending via Messenger:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

Home » Funny Galaxy Quotes

Funny galaxy quotes

New funny galaxy quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

…

Commentary:
"NASA called—they want their star back! 🚀✨ #OutOfThisWorld"
2 months ago
Share →: All these galaxies and planets, and we ended up on the one with 40 hour work weeks.

Commentary:
Looks like we took a cosmic wrong turn—should’ve aimed for the planets with free ice cream! 🌌🌍😂 Guess the universe's idea of "space exploration" is just finding new ways to stretch a 40-hour week. 🚀⏳✨ Maybe next time we’ll discover a planet where Mondays are optional! 😉🌟
4 months ago
Share →: There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy and perhaps two trillion galaxies in total, and I just wonder if Miss Universe fully understands her achievement.

Commentary:
Wow, talk about some stiff galactic competition! 👑🌌 Miss Universe better put on her interstellar crown and sash because she's got some serious cosmic competition out there! 😄🌠 #OutOfThisWorldBeauty #MissUniverseGalacticEdition
6 months ago
Share →: Attention: will the owner of a small blue planet with tectonic plates please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating.

Commentary:
🌏🚗 Oh dear, it seems like Mother Earth is feeling a bit overheated from all that tectonic plate activity! Maybe it's time for a planetary pit stop and some cool-down time in the cosmic garage. Attention, dear planet owner – your ride needs some TLC! 😉 #EarthMaintenance #CosmicCarTroubles

For even more funny galaxy quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny galaxy quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

10 minutes ago

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Why learn new slang? Stay bogus.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Babe, are you ok? You’ve barely talked about the horrors of being alive.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you don’t know, with no teeth.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

If you’re cheering for the stormtroopers, we cannot be friends.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via X:

Feels like the Chinese government turned up the power on the sleepy ray they use on me every morning.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face, but with words.

Trending via Snapchat:

Obsessed with how Siri just doesn’t work at all, ever.

Trending via Facebook:

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

Trending via Discord:

If you think voting is pointless wait until you hear about writing posts here.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Put my too-weak notice in at the gym.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

Just landed via Instagram:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Making waves on X:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

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