Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

I don’t have a yoga mat, but I have a Twister mat, and it’s the same thing.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

After ten true crime podcasts you start to think you could probably solve a murder. After a hundred you start to think you could probably get away with one.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

I don’t get it when people say they are only a “little” angry, I am either not mad or will kill you.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

The only exercise I done last month was running out of money.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

You’re still ragebaiting? Everyone is on vagueposting now. Keep up.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Making waves on Telegram:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Balloons are so weird. “Happy birthday, here’s a plastic sack of my breath.”

Seen just now on Pinterest:

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Seen just now on WeChat:

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

Trending via Reddit:

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Just shared via Instagram:

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

Making waves on X:

People don’t get slapped enough with empty gloves these days.

Live now on Snapchat:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Going viral on Telegram:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Funny mass quotes

Funny mass quotes bring a hilarious twist to everyday moments, making crowds and gatherings way more entertaining 😂🎉 Whether you’re stuck in a long line or at a big event, these witty gems will have you laughing out loud 🤣🔥 Get ready to share some smiles and lighten up any crowd with humor that connects us all! 😄🙌

New funny mass quotes 👇

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

1 month ago

ancestors, cat, Christmas, Christmas sweater, clothing, Earth, extinction, five, holiday, house, house cat, humor, i, irony, killed, mass, mass extinction, me, pets, put, survival, sweater, trying
Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

1 month ago

both, commentary, comparison, criticism, grave, group, humor, mass, mass grave, offensive, people, social, social commentary, stereotype, stereotypes, together
Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

1 month ago

communication, digital, digital life, distraction, humor, internet, life, mass, media, social, social media, technology, Twitter, weapon
So, does anyone know how to end mass religious psychosis, or is it just a thing now until we slowly die off from climate-induced disasters?

1 month ago

anyone, apocalypse, belief, climate, climate disaster, die, disaster, disasters, end, humor, just, know, mass, mass belief, psychosis, religion, religious, satire, survival, thing

All funny mass quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Slack this month:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

68 shares on YouTube this month:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

66 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sorry, I missed your call. I watched it ring and everything.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t tell me that everything was better in the past. I was there.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

14 shares on Threads this month:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

77 shares on Messenger this month:

If you stare at your face in the back of a spoon you look a lot like someone who doesn’t know how to use cutlery.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

44 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

“This was on sale!” is why I’m always broke.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I think they’ve made more Kung-Fu Panda movies in the last 20 years than they’ve made actual pandas.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

“You don’t look 40.” How am I supposed to look?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

To be gentle in this world is an act of rebellion.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know if I’m still tired or already tired.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Life hack: you don’t need salt if you just cry into your dinner.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve finally found a book that speaks to me. I believe it’s called an “audiobook”.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Asian girl at tech company: Wow, everyone here is so friendly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,511

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

If you push your belly button and nose at the same time, your brain takes a screenshot.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Threatening my wife with a tariff every time she makes fun of me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Been getting really into nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

The problem with leading by example is that no one pays attention.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

If people continue to behave so badly, I will donate my organs to an animal shelter.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on YouTube:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Just landed via YouTube:

I could tell my beard needed a trim when I started seeing some of the pictures my kids were drawing of me.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Just shared via Messenger:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I put on my Godzilla costume, then go to the miniature golf course to beat up the windmill.

Just landed via Telegram:

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

Just shared via Telegram:

If a tree falls in a forest and doesn’t make a sound, maybe that’s where your kid should be practicing the piano.

Trending via Telegram:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

Just shared via Reddit:

I don’t wanna be dramatic but the work week continuously restarting is literally ruining my life.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴