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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Hannibal Lecter didn’t have to be a serial killer, he was scary enough as a foodie.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

The ways printers are like kids: Need feeding, are noisy and can’t function when offline.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I’m an optimist and i understand how annoying that is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

814 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,976

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,976

36 minutes ago

3,418

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

Spotted on Threads:

Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Loving her was my second biggest mistake. Not buying Bitcoins in 2010 still remains the first.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

Going viral on Messenger:

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Live now on Pinterest:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

Trending via Reddit:

Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

Home » Funny Stretch Quotes

Funny stretch quotes

New funny stretch quotes 👇

4 months ago
Share →: My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'nap position' – a state of perpetual relaxation 🛌 Sounds like your body just refuses to commit to any form of fitness! It's all about that elastic band life, stretching out and bouncing back 🔄💪 Maybe your body's secretly training for the Olympics in napping… Gold medal dreams in snoozing, coming right up! 🥇😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between our lazy bodies and the demand for stretching – the ultimate melodrama of the muscles! 💪😂 It's like our limbs have a mind of their own, asking for that extra bit of length as if they're auditioning for a role in a yoga class! 😆 #StretchingDrama"

For even more funny stretch quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny stretch quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

814 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,976

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,976

36 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

I need an app that deletes my number from other people’s phones.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Getting accused of using AI when you didn’t is like this century’s version of a witch allegation.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

People just don’t build cities on rock and roll anymore.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I need money, not feelings.

Trending via Telegram:

Imagine how organized the first person to write down a recipe must have been.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Automatic doors that don’t open fast enough make me look dumb.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Breaking via WeChat:

Let’s ride this misunderstanding into the sunset.

Just landed via Slack:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

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