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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,285

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Going viral on Telegram:

Girls flirt by orbiting your general location like an electron.

Shared recently on Instagram:

When I find it, I don’t need it. When I need it, I can’t find it.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

Freshly posted on Discord:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Trending via Slack:

You can be under 25, just don’t do it around me.

Trending via YouTube:

If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I like to stay grounded by keeping the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Funny views quotes

Funny views quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 😂 and wit 🤪 to your day! Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or share a clever perspective that makes everyone chuckle, these gems will keep you smiling 😄 and thinking 🤔. Get ready to see the world through a hilarious lens 🌍✨ that turns ordinary moments into unforgettable laughs!

New funny views quotes 👇

All funny views quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Messenger this month:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Imagine thinking you have all the answers.

69 shares on X this month:

Before they perfected the Q-tip, you have to wonder what kinds of horrific things went wrong with tips A-P.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

Wait, some of you are actually seeing for free? No glasses, no contacts? Wow!

69 shares on Threads this month:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

50 shares on Messenger this month:

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

84 shares on Threads this month:

I learned Morse code, and then I couldn’t sleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Spices were first brought to Western Europe in the Middle Ages. Some of them are still at the back of my cupboard.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And they were correct. Honestly, great call from the haters.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,260

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

This is your sign to cancel all work meetings today.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Going bananas on Snapchat:

There’s not gonna be a civil war. None of us can afford to take that much time off work.

Just landed via Threads:

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

Seen just now on Twitch:

They say money can’t buy happiness, but could someone just give me a lot of it and let me see for myself?

Spotted on Reddit:

I think probably the reason some people look better at 30 than at 20 is because they’re wealthier.

Just landed via Messenger:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Just shared via Instagram:

“I’m either extremely productive or staring at the wall like I’m in a Victorian painting.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.

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