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Finally, a subscription service where Granny's secret pie recipe is the real guilty pleasure! 🥧🧶👵
146 Funny woman quotes
Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.
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Trying to avoid ghosts of bad WiFi past! 📱🔦😂
When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.
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Out of respect for my wallet, my phone has started ghosting women for me 😂📵💸
The baddest women come into your life when you have 37 dollars left.
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When your wallet's on a diet, that's when the real adventure begins! 💃💸😅
Men are very good at being women lately.
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"When makeup tutorials start looking like magic tricks, you know men have leveled up! 💄✨🤣"
As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”
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Ew: the ultimate superpower for deflecting weirdos. 💁♀️🦸♀️🦹♀️
Unfortunately, I am literally obsessed with the woman I am when I get stuff done, so I’m just going to keep doing that.
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That overachieving version of you should totally pay rent for all this motivation! 🏠💪😄
Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.
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Taking notes for my next date: destination jazz club. 💃🎷 Guess it's time to swap Netflix for a sax solo! 🎶😄
Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.
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Mastering the art of "ignore and walk away" like a ninja in heels! 🕶️💁♀️💃
I love when I see a really beautiful car, and I look inside, and it’s a beautiful woman. That’s fire.
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🔥 When the car's as stunning as the driver… it’s a double-take kinda day! 😎🚗