I have almost 100,000 miles on my office chair. So I got that going for me.

Commentary:
"Wow, with almost 100,000 miles on your office chair, you must be the Lewis Hamilton of the workplace! πŸŽοΈπŸ’¨ At least you can boast about your impressive 'chair-acing' skills! πŸ˜‚ #WinningAtSitting"