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Commentary:
Well, talk about a early riser! 🐦💪 Looks like this bird's got the breakfast shift locked in. Who knew birds could be such overachievers? 😂🌅

animals, bird, early, guy, hell, humor, joke, just, observation, sarcasm, saw

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

0

2 months ago

cookie, humor, i, indulgence, just, minute, movie, procrastination, self-deception, tell
Enjoy your 30s, because in your 40s, your first check engine lights come on.

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2 months ago

30s, 40s, age, aging, car, check, check engine light, decade, engine, enjoy, health, humor, joke, life, life joke, light, midlife
Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

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2 months ago

believe, career, childhood, cover, cover letter, dream, dumb, ever, fun, girl, grow, having, humor, i, letter, letters, little, pony, rainbow, ride, sarcasm, space, work
That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

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2 months ago

distraction, emails, Facebook, funny moment, insta, know, media, moment, new, procrastination, should, social, social media, start, work, working, x, YouTube
I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

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2 months ago

comedy, humor, i, irony, joke, jokes, know, opinion, people, stealing, worse
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

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2 months ago

animal, crafting, found, humor, i, just, knit, learning, sheep, surprise, sweater, wool

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them.

37 shares on Slack this month:

Once my school teacher lectured me for unacceptable behavior. That’s 30 mins of sleep I am never getting back

31 shares on TikTok this month:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

98 shares on Reddit this month:

I finally used a screw from the random screw collection I’ve been accumulating for 25 years, and I’ve never felt so alive.

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you have a pure heart, you can make pretty much any non-baking meal off just vibes and intuition.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

49 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

89 shares on Slack this month:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

It turns out, as you get older, you don’t actually figure anything out; you just don’t have any energy to care anymore.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

The husband, child, and dog are all snoring. WTF is this?

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

More candlelight, less gaslight, babe.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Maturity is when you realize money can actually buy happiness.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Coffee is just goth water.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

Just landed via Facebook:

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

Going viral on Twitch:

Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

Just shared via Discord:

Dissecting an alien and getting bitterly jealous at their crazy organs.

Trending via Snapchat:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Trending via Threads:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Live now on Facebook:

I will never stop being a quitter!

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Breaking via X:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

Enjoy your 30s, because in your 40s, your first check engine lights come on.

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨