Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

The closest I have ever come to bungee jumping was when I was born.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Nostalgia isn’t as good as it used to be.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Why does everyone force introverts to leave their comfort zone, but no one forces extroverts to shut up for a while?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

If a man says he’ll fix it, he will fix it. There’s no need to remind him every six months.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Reverse cowgirl so I can post selfies.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,704

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Just landed via Messenger:

Every time I buy vegetables it’s a triumph of hope over experience.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

Going viral on Reddit:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Trending via TikTok:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

Just shared via Discord:

All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.

Making waves on WeChat:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

Making waves on YouTube:

The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Farting: the sneeze of the south with no blessing in sight! 💨😂

bless, bless you, bodily, bodily function, fart, function, humor, manners, nobody

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

0

2 months ago

browser, clear, forgot, grave, history, humor, Jesus, joke, religion, resurrection, rose, tech
Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

0

2 months ago

balance, drink, health, humor, hydration, limit, me, screen, screen time, self-care, someone, time, water
I’m not feeling very worky today.

0

2 months ago

feeling, humor, motivation, procrastination, productivity, today, work
Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

0

2 months ago

habit, humor, i, man, much, paper, paper towel, spending, spending habit, towel, unfortunately, wealth
The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

0

1 month ago

answer, cabin, getaway, humor, nature, retreat, woods
Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

0

5 months ago

actually, benefit, humor, i, imposter, imposter syndrome, job, jobs, little, observation, people, self-doubt, sometimes, syndrome, watch, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on WeChat this month:

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

In case no one told you today. I’m beautiful.

51 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

39 shares on WeChat this month:

I was actually about to do a workout when the couch threw itself protectively under me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Living in your parent’s house is free because you pay with your soul.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

They should invent a DoorDash but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

A moment of silence for everything I have to do but am not doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Seen just now on Threads:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Just landed via Telegram:

Bad news. Right now is as young as you’re going to be.

Just shared via Facebook:

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

Shared recently on Twitch:

Hannibal Lecter didn’t have to be a serial killer, he was scary enough as a foodie.

Going viral on X:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

At what age do I delete Snapchat?

Shared recently on Facebook:

Onesies are amazing till you have to really pee in the middle of the night then you question all your life’s decisions.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

I’m not feeling very worky today.

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨