Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

My teen believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left, and oh, how I laughed and laughed.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Tuesday is just another Monday, but reheated.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,599

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

Spreading quickly via X:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Seen just now on Messenger:

Gonna get my eye looked at today. Usually it’s the other way around.

Spotted on TikTok:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

Just shared via Snapchat:

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

Just shared via Threads:

I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your ears need glasses too! 🤓👂😂

communication, excuse, eyesight, glasses, hearing, humor, i, misunderstanding, repeat, said, sorry

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

1 month ago
activity, car, humor, just, making, me, noise, noises, singing, strange, strange noise
Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

1 month ago
commitment, dating, humor, just, marriage, married, overrate, relationship
I like listening to music in languages I don’t speak because sometimes I just don’t wanna know what anybody is talking about.

1 week ago
communication, entertainment, foreign, foreign language, humor, i, just, know, language, languages, listening, misunderstanding, music, sometimes, speak, talking
Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

1 month ago
beginning, cars, deer, front, humor, irony, sacrifice, throw, understand, understanding, wildlife
Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

1 month ago
bad, bad relationship, dating, Facebook, Facebook memory, humor, i, life, love, love life, majority, me, memory, men, regret, relationship, taste, thank
She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

1 month ago
3am, 40, attraction, beautiful, fitness, humor, kind, late, late night, me, night, push-up, room

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you’re sleep-deprived and type the symptoms into Google, you’re as good as dead.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Being gracefully unhinged is the only way to get through the everyday bullshit.

Live now on WeChat:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

Trending via Snapchat:

Called in, “Let’s make this simple. What excuse haven’t I used yet?”

Going viral on Slack:

I want this laziness removed from my body.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

I like listening to music in languages I don’t speak because sometimes I just don’t wanna know what anybody is talking about.

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

I can’t tell if I need coffee, a hug, or to just go live in the woods forever.

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Pretty sure the best place to hide a dead body is in a new tab you opened to read later.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Cookbook, but each recipe includes a photo of all the dishes that need to be cleaned after making it.

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

I am very depressed and in a really bad mood. Perhaps it will get better if I sit inside on a beautiful day and dwell compulsively.

If you get bitten by a snake and you’re not sure if it was poisonous, simply wait to see if you die or not. That should give you your answer.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

They should invent a man who is being genuine when he says things to me.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

I’m gonna start telling men I know a spot and it’s just me dropping them off at therapy.

For once, I’d like to spiral into control.

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

I like listening to music in languages I don’t speak because sometimes I just don’t wanna know what anybody is talking about.

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏