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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

You have a bucket list, I have my head in a bucket, we are not the same.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

So stupid how New York is actually as cool as everyone says.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Cholesterol has a special place in my heart.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in. See if that works.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,014

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Spotted on Slack:

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Making waves on TikTok:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Breaking via YouTube:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

Spotted on TikTok:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Can’t wait for when we’re all in our 80’s and still tweeting.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Make it a habit to cry and act unhinged at meetings so you’re never invited back.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I am the opposite of artificial intelligence. I am authentic stupidity.

Trending via WeChat:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Funny card game quotes

Funny card game quotes bring the laughter and spice to every shuffle and deal 🎉🃏 Whether you’re bluffing your way to victory or just trying not to lose your cool, these witty lines capture the joy and chaos of the game 🤣🔥 Perfect for sharing with friends or adding some humor to your next game night! Let the fun begin and may the best player win (or at least crack the best joke) 😜🎲

New funny card game quotes 👇

All funny card game quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

62 shares on Instagram this month:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

97 shares on Twitch this month:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

50 shares on Discord this month:

Rent really don’t make no sense. Like, why is my apartment getting a raise every year? Who is doing the performance review?

61 shares on YouTube this month:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

One day you’ll find someone obsessed with you. It’s probably going to be a squirrel.

21 shares on Instagram this month:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

54 shares on Instagram this month:

No one declines an incoming call faster than a 3-year-old watching YouTube.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

It doesn’t matter how old you are, when it starts thundering and lightning, you go and sit at the window to watch.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If rich people aren’t upset after an election, then we have failed.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

What base is it when he says, “I know you need it badly,” but he’s talking about sleep?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Just blocked a guy for accusing me of being “all talk”. On Twitter.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

They lie on the job descriptions, so lie on your resume.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,788

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Signatures are so unserious, just “pinky promise” for adults. Write your name in a silly little way on this very important piece of paper so we that we can send you to jail if you do anything wrong.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

If you don’t laugh at my jokes then I will.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I’ve reached that age where I don’t have to drink to forget because it just happens naturally now.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

A haunted house but in every room someone is asking you to say a little something about yourself.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Just landed via TikTok:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Just shared via Instagram:

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

Breaking via TikTok:

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I will improve my life after I doom scroll a little more. Yes.

Trending via Pinterest:

The elder Zoomer speaks of the Wii with reverence.

Going viral on Reddit:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

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