Funny glow quotes

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  1 month ago

  Share →: You’re way hotter in your forties and fifties than in your twenties. The glow up is in the grow up.

  Commentary:
  🔥🤣 "Finally, a reason to look forward to wrinkles! Who knew maturity came with a built-in heating system? #GlowUpGoals #AgeLikeFineWine 🍷✨"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like your knee's trying to join the superhero squad with a little extra sparkle! 💥🦵✨ Maybe next time, it'll come with its own glow-in-the-dark badge. 😂🤩 Keep an eye out—your knees might just be planning a light show!

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

  Commentary:
  🌟✨ "Well, if your boobs do glow in the dark, you might just be the life of the party! 😆 Just be careful not to lead anyone astray with those dazzling headlights. Ping me if you need some glow-in-the-dark bra shopping tips! 💡👙"

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  4 months ago

  Share →: I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a night light when you've got Temu's special glow-in-the-dark antidepressants? 💊✨ Say goodbye to the darkness… and hello to your new radiant aura! 😂 #GlowUp"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

  Commentary:
  "Crackling knees? More like disco knees! 💃✨ Who knew our joints had secret talents? Glow-in-the-dark knees could be the next big rave trend! 🌟💫 #PartyOnWithYourKnees"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone swapped out their nightlight for a volcano 🔥🌋. Watch out world, we've got a rage comic in the making! 😠💥"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like your body missed the memo on being a glow stick – at least it's got the cracking part down! 🔥💥 Maybe it just needs a better manual? Or some extra batteries…⚡😂"

For even more funny glow quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny glow quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌