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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I’ve just learned terrible news. My department at work is planning a team-building retreat. Thank you for your thoughts during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Sorry I left you on read, I didn’t mean to open it just yet.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,531

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

Just landed via Facebook:

Don’t be sad, laundry, nobody’s doing me either.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Trying to win an argument online is sociopathic. I would concede anything to get a stranger to leave me alone.

Making waves on Discord:

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Twitter when Franz Ferdinand got shot would have been the best day ever.

Just landed via Facebook:

Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Funny health advice quotes

Funny health advice quotes are the perfect blend of laughter and wellness 😄🍏. They turn serious tips into playful reminders that taking care of yourself doesn’t have to be boring! From quirky gym hacks to silly snack swaps, these witty nuggets keep motivation high and stress low. Ready to smile your way to better health? Let’s dive into some hilarious wisdom that’s good for the body and the soul! 🏃‍♂️🥦😂

New funny health advice quotes 👇

All funny health advice quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on X this month:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

92 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

55 shares on Messenger this month:

I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

60 shares on Facebook this month:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. Y’all just happen to be there.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

Life begins when you can afford it.

76 shares on Reddit this month:

The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

By the power vested in me by Facebook, I now pronounce you unfriended and restricted. You may now kiss my butt.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Thought getting captured by cannibals would be terrifying, but they’re actually feeding me really well.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

How great is it to do absolutely nothing and follow it up by taking a rest.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is cool, but have you ever had garlic bread?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being on Twitter right now is like playing the violin on the Titanic, except we are also making fun of the iceberg and the iceberg is getting genuinely mad.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Every outdoor cat should be given a little cowboy hat and a gun.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

15 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s no sadder tableau in all of humanity than the smoker’s terrarium at the airport.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,676

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

You don’t need to leave a message in a bottle. If the bottle is full of tequila, I’ll get the message.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

You know Santa isn’t real because no man over 40 is out past 9PM.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Golf would be more exciting to watch if they played naked.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Arab perfumes have zero chill… the entire street knows you’ve arrived.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

If parallel universe exist, I hope the other me is doing well.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

All I’m saying is that I’m closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is.

Seen just now on Threads:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Spotted on WeChat:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Going viral on Discord:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Going bananas on Discord:

The incontinent optimist sees the bladder as half empty.

Going viral on Reddit:

I went from dancing with myself in the 80s to talking to myself now.

Seen just now on Slack:

Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Just shared via Twitch:

Home is where you’ve left the shopping list.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

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