115 funny hell quotes - Page 2 - Wordgag

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

May 27, 2026

Every time I stand up, my dog gets excited as hell. He understands that I’m a real man who can make shit happen at any given moment.

May 27, 2026

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

May 27, 2026

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

May 27, 2026

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

May 27, 2026

If you’re not dropping it like it’s hot, then what the hell are you doing?

May 27, 2026

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

May 27, 2026

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

May 26, 2026

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

May 26, 2026

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

May 26, 2026

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

May 26, 2026

If a man says he’ll fix it, he will fix it. There’s no need to remind him every six months.

May 26, 2026

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

May 26, 2026

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

May 26, 2026

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

May 26, 2026

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

May 26, 2026

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

May 25, 2026

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

May 25, 2026

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

May 25, 2026

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

May 25, 2026

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

May 25, 2026

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

May 25, 2026

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

May 25, 2026

Why the hell is my laundry bin always full? I’m not even going anywhere.

May 25, 2026

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

May 25, 2026

There are so many people going to hell. I’m thinking of investing in some property there.

May 25, 2026

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

May 24, 2026

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

May 24, 2026

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

May 24, 2026

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

May 24, 2026

I generally don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’m really good at it.

May 24, 2026

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

May 24, 2026

Weekends are a scam, you spend one day exhausted and the other day anxious. Like, what the hell was that?

May 24, 2026

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

May 24, 2026

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

May 24, 2026

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

May 24, 2026

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

May 24, 2026

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

May 23, 2026

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

May 23, 2026

“How is the job search going?” First of all, that is a violent question. And it hurts me, by the way. And second, how the hell should I know.

May 23, 2026