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When you and your belly form the ultimate kitchen band 🎶🥁🍲
14852 Funny humor quotes
If there was a pill for procrastination… I’d probably take it tomorrow.
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I'll save laughing at this for later 😂💊⏳
TMZ will find out you’re dead before you do.
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Gone so soon that TMZ already booked an interview with my ghost 👻📸😅
Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.
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Sounds like a concert where "smoked" means the food *and* the vibes! 🎵🔥🍳
And to my great-grandchildren, I leave 48,567 screenshots.
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Their inheritance may not be gold, but they'll have enough screenshots to create a museum of memes! 😂📸📱
Got a botched circumcision, now my willy wonka.
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Talk about a chocolate factory malfunction 🍫😅🚧
Do you ever find yourself just thinkin’ about bread?
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When I'm staring into space, 99% of the time I'm planning my next bread encounter 🍞😄🥖
What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?
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Starting your mornings with a triple espresso and existential dread! ☕😅📉
Andrew Tate is what you’d get if Axe body spray gained consciousness.
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I didn’t know Axe body spray had a spokesperson! 🤣👃💨
Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.
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Sounds like you're the "toot" fairy, spreading laughter while everyone else dreams! 💨🤣🌙