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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

The only time anyone should watch the news is to study how psychological manipulation works on the general public.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

After having a week off, my boss returns to work today. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

Updated

14 minutes ago

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Somebody should market a beer called “Occasionally”. So when asked, I can say, “I only drink occasionally”.

Just landed via Messenger:

It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

Just landed via YouTube:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Just landed via Messenger:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Spotted on YouTube:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Just landed via Slack:

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Going viral on YouTube:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Trending via Threads:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Going viral on Instagram:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

Updated

14 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

You know you got a bad haircut when she insists on giving you a $10 discount.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

If you call me from a private number, I’ll respect your privacy and won’t answer.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

I dunno how to flirt but I can insult you so nicely.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

“You don’t look 40.” How am I supposed to look?

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Messenger:

Just had my biannual teeth cleaning like some barn animal.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If it weren’t for this whole job thingy that pays me money, I’d become a professional nap taker.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Breaking via Reddit:

Whenever I lose my faith in justice, I look at the high school beauties from back then today. Then I’m fine again.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Trending via Discord:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Just landed via Instagram:

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

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