Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

69. Some might call it nasty. I call it a romantic dinner for 2.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Is this art or trash?

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

354 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,623

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,623

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Seen just now on Messenger:

He’s called James Cameron because he turns the camera on.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

As a childless adult, it is my duty to embrace hobbies and pastimes that my peers cannot, as they have sacrificed their free time to maintain the population. I must vibe and chill, and do fun things, in their honor.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Just shared via Facebook:

Family fistfights brought to you by Monopoly.

Live now on Facebook:

He just walked right into my heart and switched on the lights.

Just shared via X:

They should make statues of regular people, like you’re walking through the park and there’s a statue of your friend Jeff.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m sorry I said “Awooga” when you took off your clothes. Do you still want to have sexy time?

Going viral on X:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤣 I guess I’ve been channeling my inner "weird uncle" all along! 🧔🕺

carrying, energy, God, humor, i, language, meaning, means, meant, misunderstanding, oh, slang, thought, unc, uncle, uncool, weird, word, word meaning

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

2 months ago

awesome, craving, desire, eat, food, fridge, happiness, kitchen, moment, open, snack, surprise, thing, wanted
Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

2 months ago

blood, generosity, give, horoscope, humor, idea, prediction, week
Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

2 months ago

avoiding, buying, cost, costs, expense, girl, humor, math, money, shipping, shipping cost, shopping, shopping strategy, strategy
America was more fun when organized crime was done by Italians in Chicago.

1 week ago

America, Chicago, crime, done, fun, gangster, humor, italian, nostalgia, organized, organized crime
I need a Netflix show called: “Background noise while you scroll on your phone.”

2 months ago

background, background noise, entertainment, i, multitasking, need, Netflix, noise, phone, scroll, show, while
Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

2 months ago

backstory, counting, emotional, emotional investment, emotionally, humor, i, invested, investment, need, sheep, sleep, therapy, think, tried

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Instagram this month:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

Job applications be like “how did you hear about us?”. Bro why, was it a secret?

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

65 shares on YouTube this month:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

87 shares on Discord this month:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

82 shares on Pinterest this month:

My parents told me Santa wasn’t real when I was 16. Jokes on them, because I’m at the mall right now, and guess who’s here.

86 shares on Slack this month:

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Looking over both shoulders before googling “Chinese burger.”

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Later is the best time to do anything.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I noticed you haven’t posted in a few weeks, and just wanted to thank you.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Liking someone romantically is actually just a humiliation ritual.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

This whole week could have been an email.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Facebook:

No parenting book prepares you for the stank of your kid’s soccer bag.

Live now on Twitch:

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

Shared recently on WeChat:

You can’t hurt my feelings, I used to bring my dad the wrong tools.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

By age 40, you should have an entire wardrobe of clothes—one size too small—that you keep in eternal optimism that you’ll fit in them again one day.

Just shared via YouTube:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Nicole Kidman being in a film called Babygirl is actually perfect cause it’s like another version of her last name.

Going viral on Messenger:

You may find my attraction to Goofy weird, but I don’t give a hyuck.

Shared recently on Facebook:

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

America was more fun when organized crime was done by Italians in Chicago.

I need a Netflix show called: “Background noise while you scroll on your phone.”

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨