Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Snow White and the seven dwarves of the menopause; Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful, and Psycho.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

God knew I would be too powerful if I had conversation skills.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,340

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Good morning, may your coffee be strong and your boss not weird today.

Making waves on TikTok:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Some call it flirting… I call it just being extra nice to someone who is extra attractive…

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Rehab is a great place to meet people that like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

Making waves on Reddit:

When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Just landed via YouTube:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Live now on WeChat:

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Just landed via Twitch:

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When rappers make new words just so their rhymes are on point, Shakespeare's somewhere nodding in approval! 😂🎤📖

humor, just, lyric, mispronunciation, moment, music, pronunciation, rapper, rappers, rhyme, word, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

0

2 months ago

AI, answer, artificial intelligence, ChatGPT, day, ever, every, everyday, frustration, humor, i, keys, suing, where
You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

0

2 months ago

dynamics, ever, friend, friends, friendship, friendship dynamics, group, guy, henchman, humor, less, male, male friend group, meet
Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

0

5 months ago

back, blessing, daily, daily life, house, humor, leaving, leaving house, life, returning, safely, safety, underrated, underrated blessing
Acting jealous while secretly cheating is a pure talent of witchcraft.

0

2 months ago

acting, cheating, deception, humor, jealous, jealousy, relationship, talent, while, witchcraft
They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

0

2 months ago

charge, expenses, eyes, grocery, humor, money, observation, open, paper, poop, reality, toilet, toilet paper, turn
Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

0

2 months ago

accidental, accidental click, accidentally, activity, algorithm, click, different, Facebook, humor, identity, media, much, online, online activity, person, post, social, social media, technology, UFO

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Threads this month:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

38 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

43 shares on Reddit this month:

My favorite part about standing in line is watching the other lines move more quickly.

96 shares on X this month:

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?

54 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

You should be able to call in sad to work.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Saturday Night Fever, but it’s just me yelling, “Five, six, seven, eight!” while my cat lies down and refuses to participate.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

To the person who stole my place in the queue. I’m after you now.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I’ve watched porn with better writing than Stranger Things.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

Making waves on Pinterest:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

Trending via Instagram:

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

“Do it scared!” Thanks, but I have done everything scared. When is it my turn to do it calm?

Just shared via YouTube:

Rewatching my story every time somebody heart it to see what they see.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Making waves on X:

Current relationship status: sleeping diagonally across the bed.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

My security system is just a bunch of my unpaid bills taped to my front door.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

Acting jealous while secretly cheating is a pure talent of witchcraft.

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨