Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

The reason most of us stay up late is because we don’t want our free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’m going to become more attractive or more delusional; I haven’t decided yet.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Love to come home after a long day’s work and relax with one thousand short-form videos.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I have been alive all my life, and have not once seen a Chinese food commercial.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Liking someone romantically is actually just a humiliation ritual.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Just landed via WeChat:

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.

Just shared via X:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Going viral on Twitch:

The kids in Mrs. Doubtfire were pretty dumb if they couldn’t figure out that their nanny was famous actor Robin Williams the whole time.

Trending via YouTube:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Tolerate the lactose already, you heathen.

Making waves on Messenger:

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.

1 week ago

Funny quote about vanity and vulnerability with playful, witty words on appearance.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
As long as the lights are dim and the compliments are plentiful, mission accomplished! 😂🙈💪

body, body image, confidence, desire, ever, good, hope, humor, image, look good, naked, someone, take, wanted

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on X this month:

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

60 shares on WeChat this month:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

100 shares on Messenger this month:

Hey (with the intention of going to sleep).

95 shares on Slack this month:

Perks of being a girl: You can think about whatever you want in public without worrying about boners.

81 shares on Pinterest this month:

Amazing if accurate: bleeding money.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

Warning: not watching the news may lead to a heightened sense of joy, security, and optimism.

45 shares on Messenger this month:

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

When my husband says, “Let me ask my wife,” he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

People who ask “Can I call you” are so sweet. Like, obviously you cannot, but so sweet.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a fabulous time to be alive if you love: verification codes, verifying your email, yelling ‘REAL PERSON’ into a phone at a robot, reading nightmarish news all day, every day, hot.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

This is not an empty room, this is a very successful anti-party.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry boys, but I’ve already got my eyes on a guy who’s not interested.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,749

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I hate when people are outside when I’m trying to parallel park. I need some privacy.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

If you ever feel like a failure, just remember, Domino’s tried to open pizza chains in Italy.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I think Australians should have to go three rounds in the ring with a kangaroo before they eat him.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Every time I spend my own money, I feel like somebody needs to reimburse me.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Let’s build a fort with blankets and pillows, and just stay in it all day.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.

Live now on Reddit:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Shared recently on Threads:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Breaking via Instagram:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m just a girl standing in front of a cat who followed me to the bathroom.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I can’t flirt, but I’ll awkwardly giggle at everything you say.

Spotted on TikTok:

Addicted to bad posture. Omggg, why is it so comfortable to give yourself scoliosis?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Is this art or trash?

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