“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

If you stand too close to me in the check out line, you may as well pay for my stuff while you’re breathing down my neck.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.