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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Everyone’s all up in arms about how undemocratic the electoral college is and yet we let our weather be decided by a single unelected groundhog.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Making waves on Slack:

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

Reported on Snapchat:

Me attempting to flirt: So do you like doing things?

Just shared via Pinterest:

Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

Making waves on Slack:

I wish British people had subtitles so I knew what they are on about.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Trending via Slack:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Just landed via TikTok:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Live now on TikTok:

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I really feel like we need to have more fun in life, because literally nothing matters.

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Funny bathrooms quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

35 minutes ago

Users Online

3,420

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

If I were in charge of Nike, I’d change the slogan to “Just Say You Did It. Nobody Ever Checks.”

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Good morning, may your coffee be strong and your boss not weird today.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Live now on Reddit:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

Just shared via Twitch:

Coffee is just goth water.

Trending via Twitch:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

Shared recently on Facebook:

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Going viral on Reddit:

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Trending via WeChat:

Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

Trending via Pinterest:

Me (seductively looking at a potato): would mash.

Seen just now on Facebook:

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

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