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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

It’s generally a good idea to start punching and throwing elbows immediately upon waking up because there may be enemies nearby.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Not really interested in anything that isn’t everything.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize, I honestly did not think you could read.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Breaking up is fine, but logging me out of your Netflix is crazy.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Why is the debate at night time? Let’s get this thing started at 4pm. I don’t need to get riled up so close to bedtime.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,315

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

Trending via Messenger:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Breaking via Pinterest:

How do I un-know people?

Live now on YouTube:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

Just landed via Instagram:

I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have.

Trending via Instagram:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

Just shared via Pinterest:

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Just landed via Discord:

I often got called “an old soul” and such like by adults when I was a child. I think this was a kind way of saying I was a sad little freak.

Funny chimney quotes

Funny chimney quotes 🏠🔥 add a spark of humor to chilly days and cozy nights! Whether you’re dreaming of Santa’s grand entrance or just love the crackling fire vibes, these witty sayings bring warmth and laughter to any fireplace moment. Get ready to giggle and enjoy some chimney chuckles that’ll light up your day like a roaring blaze! 😄✨🧣

New funny chimney quotes 👇

All funny chimney quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

83 shares on X this month:

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

26 shares on Discord this month:

Well, at least my cat is supportive of me doing less and laying around more.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

13 shares on Messenger this month:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

75 shares on X this month:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

31 shares on Pinterest this month:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When my husband says, “Let me ask my wife,” he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI take a 30-minute poop right after clocking in.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When your electric toothbrush dies, it becomes a regular toothbrush. Don’t freak out. Just calm down and remember your training.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My doctor just diagnosed me with anxiety and constipation. Now I’m worried shitless.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s: you get tired from sleeping now.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t even believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in 5 minutes.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Student life is all about convincing your parents that you are studying, convincing your friends that you are not, and convincing yourself that you’ll study from tomorrow.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,497

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Weekends now feel like short commercial breaks in a stressful movie.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

“Well, at least tomorrow is Friday.” -Me, having a bad Wednesday that’s about to get even worse.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

No parenting book prepares you for the stank of your kid’s soccer bag.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

They should name a personality disorder after me.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Just rolled a joint. Not to get high or anything. It was just my ankle.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Telegram:

They say dress for the job you want, so I walk around dressed like Darth Vader.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Just shared via Instagram:

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

Just landed via Messenger:

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Seen just now on YouTube:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Shared recently on X:

Super excited about a brand new week of faking it.

Trending via Twitch:

You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Well, it took several decades, but I might have finally run out of things to say.

Trending via TikTok:

I will improve my life after I doom scroll a little more. Yes.

Going bananas on Discord:

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

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