Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I changed my password to ‘incorrect’ so whenever I forget it, the computer tells me it’s incorrect, and I’m like, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to be so rude about it.’

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I was born tired, and I will die tired. If I ever tell you I’m not tired, I’m probably lying.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Every time I buy vegetables it’s a triumph of hope over experience.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Coffee and more coffee is a perfect combo.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Dec 30, 2025

3,828

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

Until I open the wrapper and look inside it’s Schrödinger’s Kit Kat.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

My ex thinks I’m with someone else, someone else thinks I’m with my ex, everyone wonders where I am. Here I am. Just enjoying my own life.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Every time I get the urge to clean, I watch Hoarders and I decide my house isn’t that dirty after all.

Seen just now on Slack:

Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.

Going viral on Reddit:

I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.

Going bananas on YouTube:

“I don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Commenting “humiliation ritual” on a pic of my friend out with his family.

Funny clip quotes

Funny clip quotes bring instant laughter and good vibes to your day 🎉😂 Whether you need a quick pick-me-up or a hilarious share for your feed, these bite-sized gems are pure entertainment gold 💎📲 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort as you dive into the funniest moments captured on screen 🎬🤣 Perfect for brightening moods and sparking joy anywhere, anytime!

New funny clip quotes 👇

I like to just appear out of nowhere and say, “this looks like a job for a binder clip.”

0

2 months ago

antics, appear, binder, binder clip, clip, humor, i, job, just, looks, nowhere, say, surprise
There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward situations, clip, funny moments, good, grooming, humor, library, moments, never, place, public, public space, situations, space, toenails
At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

0

2 months ago

bag, bag of chips, bedtime, chips, claw, claw clip, clip, daily, daily routine, day, end, end of day, hair, humor, i, move, ritual, routine, snack, snack time, time

All funny clip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

When life shuts a door, open it again. It’s a door. That’s how they work.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

You have 8 hours remaining to create shareholder value.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

63 shares on Discord this month:

Knowing I’ve been called crazy, but never ugly, is how I sleep at night.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I may not be the smartest or most athletic man in the world. There’s no second part to this, keep scrolling.

51 shares on WeChat this month:

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

45 shares on Threads this month:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab.

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I passed my genetic engineering exam with flying koalas.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Cancel culture has been canceled.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Flat earth is too mainstream, hollow earth is where it’s at.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where I understand that paying a little extra for convenience and comfort is absolutely okay.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not sleeping alone if there are crumbs in your bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,887

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Parents will discover a movie on Netflix that you can’t even imagine.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just sitting on the couch googling if penguins have knees.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

So, you’re telling me I’m just supposed to get up every day and keep living like this? Seems like a scam to me.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Amazing if accurate: bleeding money.

Spotted on Instagram:

It’s okay to admit you want my lips on yours.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Seen just now on Slack:

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

Seen just now on X:

You ever see a woman so beautiful it makes you momentarily mentally ill?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

Live now on Reddit:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Just landed via Reddit:

Ironic that the two ơ’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

Trending via Facebook:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

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