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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡­ has viewed:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ή has viewed:

Everyone says β€œDo what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡³ has viewed:

I like my bacon like I like my men, slightly burnt and crispy, and probably killing me slowly.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡¬ has shared:

FOMO is a summer thing. Winter is all about FOGO (fear of going out).

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΅ has copied:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ό has shared:

It’s time I admit something: Sometimes, when I say good night, I don’t actually go to bed right away.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has shared:

I’m in my 20s, but somehow I’m 16 and also 55 at the same time.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ώ has copied:

Sorry for being so cringey and awkward. It will definitely happen again.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has downloaded:

My parents told me Santa wasn’t real when I was 16. Jokes on them, because I’m at the mall right now, and guess who’s here.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,397

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just landed via Threads:

Therapy isn’t gonna cut it, I need vengeance.

Seen just now on Discord:

“What do you do for a living?” I do my best.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I could never journal, I’d start lying in there too.

Just shared via Twitch:

I bet my calculator app wrapped would be pretty shameful.

Just landed via Twitch:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Going viral on YouTube:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Making waves on Twitch:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Live now on Discord:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a boy that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Making waves on YouTube:

Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

Trending via WhatsApp:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

Funny Groundhog quotes

Funny Groundhog quotes bring a chuckle to this quirky tradition 🦫✨ Whether you’re team shadow or no shadow, these witty sayings add extra fun to the big day πŸŒžβ„οΈ Get ready to laugh your way through the anticipation and celebrate Groundhog Day with a smile πŸ˜„πŸŽ‰

New funny Groundhog quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny Groundhog quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on WeChat this month:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

34 shares on Slack this month:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

68 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to your 40s, your level of cleaning is directly related to whether your guest can see without readers.

43 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s ok to not have a Valentine on Valentine’s Day. I didn’t have a groundhog on Groundhog’s Day.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

76 shares on Discord this month:

Ugh, but profoundly.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

Not all works of art are in a museum. I, for example, am lying on the couch at home.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My husband clearly believes that chairs just magically push themselves back in.

5 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Hey, are you an aurora borealis or why am I waiting in vain for you to appear?

23 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

5 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The role I play at family gatherings is that of the cousin that doesn’t show up anymore.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,534

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Έ has shared:

If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I’d pick living.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡― has shared:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡² has viewed:

My burning question is who thought a two day weekend would suffice the human body.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡½ has viewed:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Someone from πŸ‡·πŸ‡΄ has shared:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has bookmarked:

My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ has bookmarked:

Good morning. Does anyone know what is right and what is wrong?

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡» has downloaded:

A dating app for people who self sabotage called Hinder.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡· has downloaded:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Facebook:

My coffee and I used to be hot. Now, we’re just bitter.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Me, to the printer: “Hey, could you print this out for me?” Printer: “Sure, but first I’ll show you all the sounds I can make.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Don’t go chasing waterfalls? The place where many video games hide easter eggs and other rare items?

Breaking via Facebook:

Who needs a weighted blanket when you’ve got the weight of the world?

Freshly posted on Threads:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Going viral on Threads:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re doing cardio.

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