Commentary:
Looks like my brain needs to hire some extra staff! 📱🤯😂
5662 Funny i quotes
I had too much to think last night.
Commentary:
Sounds like a brain hangover! 🍳🤯💭
I hope this 17th text in a row with no response finds you well.
Commentary:
Guess the only thing ghosting harder than my phone battery is you! 👻📱😂
I hate that I present as an independent woman who doesn’t need any help. It’s a facade. Help me.
Commentary:
When you're the independent woman but secretly wouldn't mind an instruction manual for life 🤷♀️😅📚
When my friends are religious, I pretend not to notice.
Commentary:
Trying not to draw battle lines at the dinner table—Godspeed! 🙏😅
The older I get, the more I respect Sleeping Beauty. She took one look at the world and said, “Nah.”
Commentary:
Sleeping Beauty might have been onto something—considering investing in a good pillow myself! 😴😂
I think we just need to accept that the 90’s was our peak as a species.
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When dial-up internet was our biggest problem and Tamagotchis were our hardest responsibility! 🕹️📟😄
I have read the room and decided to be illiterate.
Commentary:
Looks like I'm bringing back hieroglyphics to fit in! 📜🤔🙈
I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.
Commentary:
Sounds like the ultimate staycation plan: just me, my couch, and no missing snacks. 🍕📺✌️
I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.
Commentary:
Trying to make relationships easy? You must have entered the universe on cheat mode 😂🛸💕