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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Hear me out. A waiting room where the doctors wait.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Like an advent calendar, you make me want to open up more every day.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Masturbation is easy, but choosing a video is hard.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,380

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

Just shared via Slack:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Spotted on Reddit:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

Spotted on Threads:

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Spotted on Discord:

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Moving is legitimately one of the worst human experiences.

Spotted on Facebook:

The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies, you’d almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Ask your doctor if it’s right for you to eat oranges and pretend they’re planets and you’re a Greek god.

Funny lists quotes

Funny lists quotes are the perfect way to turn everyday chaos into a laugh-out-loud moment 😂📋 Whether you’re juggling tasks or just love a good chuckle, these witty gems bring humor to your to-do’s and reminders. Ready to brighten your day with clever twists and playful vibes? Let’s dive into the world where lists meet laughter and smiles are guaranteed! 😄✨

New funny lists quotes 👇

All funny lists quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Telegram this month:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

10 shares on YouTube this month:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

77 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

62 shares on YouTube this month:

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

59 shares on Telegram this month:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

61 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Let’s ride this misunderstanding into the sunset.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

What a time to be alive, it’s like the collapse of Rome, but with memes.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite hobby is withering away.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,250

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Sometimes life is like a cowshed. You step from one turd into the next.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Showering & getting in bed is literally one of the best combos ever.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Summer is here. Always put on some suncream to help the rain run off.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Men be like, “Ok, you wanna know the truth,” and lie even harder.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Anyone else smile at old people just to show that you’re one of the good ones.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

Just shared via Messenger:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Live now on Threads:

Adults should not be twins. Being twins is for children.

Just shared via Telegram:

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Today’s toddlers can switch on laptops and use apps. When I was little, I ate sand.

Shared recently on X:

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I don’t understand how some people find love several times in their lives. I first have to find someone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

When the exam is so hard that you look out the window to appreciate nature.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t.

Going viral on Snapchat:

AI is trained on what we write, so if we want to save our jobs we should all write really badly for a while. I’ve been doing my bit for years.

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