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Running at Monday like it's a horror movie villain… plot twist: it trips as we scream and scatter! 🏃💨😱🍿
374 Funny motivation quotes
Not right now. I’m manifesting.
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Channeling my inner wizard, please hold! 🧙♂️✨
My morning routine consists of talking myself out of quitting my job.
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Trying to convince my alarm clock that I have a promising future as a professional napper 😴⏰😂
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you’re stupid and you make bad decisions.
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When life gives you lemons, double-check the instructions before you start a lemonade stand! 🍋🤔🙃
Today, I started a 28-day no-swearing challenge, which I will restart tomorrow.
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Taking this challenge one swear word at a time! 🚫💢🙊
What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, but also a little grumpy.
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Stronger? Sure. Grumpier? Absolutely. I'm evolving into a moody superhero! 💪😤🙃
Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what?
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Why ruin a perfectly good relationship with my couch? 😂🛋️🍿
Why do you always wanna change your life before you fall asleep, then in the morning you wake up like ‘Nah!’
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Dreams: the only place where I'm a morning person and a billionaire! 😴💰👉🙅♂️
I love people who refuse to follow the crowd. The crowd is always lost, follow your inner compass.
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When in doubt, at least my inner compass keeps me spinning in style! 🧭🔄😄
Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.
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Ready to tackle another week of accidentally-on-purpose failing like a pro! 😅🎉 #SelfSabotageChampion