Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I could tell by the way she was pouring gasoline on a pile of my clothes that the relationship had hit some turbulence.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

239 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,508

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,508

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Just paid my rent, now I have a warm place to starve in.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Your pronouns should be get/help.

Making waves on Instagram:

Just checked my bank account. Looks like everyone’s getting a hug for Christmas.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Called in, “Let’s make this simple. What excuse haven’t I used yet?”

Going viral on Pinterest:

My summer body is just my winter body with better lighting.

Seen just now on YouTube:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.

Going viral on Twitch:

Deleting university to focus on Twitter.

Spotted on Reddit:

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Funny plea quotes

Funny plea quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when begging feels inevitable 🙏😂 Whether you’re trying to score extra snacks or avoid chores, these witty lines add charm and chuckles to your requests 😜✨ Ready to turn your pleas into pure comedy gold? Let’s dive into some laugh-out-loud expressions that make asking impossible to resist! 🎉🙌

New funny plea quotes 👇

All funny plea quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

79 shares on Threads this month:

I love doing research. I will look up some stuff in a minute.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

88 shares on Twitch this month:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

64 shares on X this month:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

17 shares on TikTok this month:

Just got chills imagining what Tom and Jerry could accomplish if they just worked together for once.

47 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

16 folks are currently checking 👀

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet God still calls it Twitter.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

239 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,508

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,508

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,441

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Mondays are for pretending. Real work begins on Tuesday.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I slept for 11 hours last night, just wanted everyone with kids to know that.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

The first step to recovery is addiction.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

My favorite unit of measurement is smithereens.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

“Because my hair is not done” is a very valid reason to decline an outing.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

You see how in cartoons, when they’re hungry, their friends start looking like a chicken leg? That’s how ovulation feels.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Spending the day with my mom and her mom, just observing the patterns.

Live now on TikTok:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Shared recently on Telegram:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Going bananas on Discord:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Just landed via Facebook:

That’s just brainslop. You only came up with that by thinking.

Going bananas on Threads:

By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.

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