Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Got my mind on my money and my money is nowhere to be found.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Feeling morally and spiritually adrift without a Sunday HBO show.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

No thanks, social media influencers. I prefer making decisions the old-fashioned way: under the influence of alcohol.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Why’s it always “NYC smells like pee” and never “my pee smells like the greatest city in the world”?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

797 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,959

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,959

Updated

16 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Pinterest:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

Making waves on WeChat:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Spotted on WeChat:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Broadcasted on Discord:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Two reasons you never date at work: 1. HR frowns upon it. 2. Your partner gets super pissed.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Trending via X:

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Home » Funny Science Fiction Quotes

Funny science fiction quotes

New funny science fiction quotes 👇

For even more funny science fiction quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny science fiction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

797 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,959

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,959

Updated

16 minutes ago

Users Online

3,422

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today, I need to be chased through the woods by a machete-wielding maniac.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

The only function of a middle name is so a child can assess how much danger they’re in.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Wine drunk doesn’t even make itself known. You’re just relaxed, and then, all of a sudden, you feel sexier.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Just once I’d like to buy a house plant that didn’t have the lifespan of a soap bubble.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I’m not like other girls. I don’t have a podcast.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Every Reddit relationship post is like “My husband dropped a big piano on my head and when I emerged from the rubble my teeth had been replaced by the keys. Am I in the wrong?”

Seen just now on Discord:

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Just landed via Reddit:

Kettlebells? I thought you said kettle chips.

Just landed via Reddit:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m officially at the age where going out on the weekend just means I’m running errands.

Spotted on Threads:

I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Making waves on Facebook:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴