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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

The phrase “Treat yourself” has ruined my bank account and waistline.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Is it healthier to drink tap water and let the fluoride calcify my pineal gland or drink bottled spring water and let micro plastics settle in my balls?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Having your own apartment by yourself is so funny, cause I really just swept the whole place naked.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Bisexual just means that I wear perfume with my men’s deodorant.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Making a record-breaking number of bad choices today, I’m really proud of myself.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

You can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, let them sip on their own bland brew.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,456

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Who called it girl math and not galgebra?

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

Trending via Pinterest:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Trending via Twitch:

Nothing fixes your life the way deactivating Instagram does.

Trending via WhatsApp:

White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

Just landed via Facebook:

We need a slur for people who use ChatGPT.

Funny self-assessment quotes

Funny self-assessment quotes 😂 bring a hilarious twist to reflecting on ourselves! Whether you’re grading your skills or just poking fun at your quirks, these witty lines add a splash of humor 🎉 to honest self-reflection. Perfect for lightening the mood during review time or sharing a laugh with friends 🙌. Ready to smile while sizing yourself up? Let’s dive into some playful perspectives! 😄✨

New funny self-assessment quotes 👇

All funny self-assessment quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Instagram this month:

Girls actually do love nice guys. It’s just that you’re not as nice a guy as you think you are…

72 shares on Instagram this month:

The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

27 shares on Facebook this month:

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

God creating the duck: waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo.

59 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

51 shares on Facebook this month:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

My home security system is just a copy of my paycheck taped to my front door.

95 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Knowing I’ve been called crazy, but never ugly, is how I sleep at night.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I decided not to go for a run today because of the weather, but mostly because of the running.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Saw the eye doctor, and that’s 90% of the vision test right there.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,376

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

I would rather walk directly into the ocean than tell people a fun fact about myself.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

It’s Monday. Please lower your voice and expectations.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Stop giving kids Bible names but no Bible lessons. Moses tried to rob me last night.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m only here to test your patience, but like, in a sexy way.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Woke up feeling not too shabby for a 60-year-old. The only problem is I’m still in my 40s.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I am the proud father of two content providers. I mean children. Two children.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Going viral on Telegram:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Going bananas on X:

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Trending via Facebook:

My love language is being sent money.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Something very chic about crying while driving… have to keep it a little classy so you don’t crash… other drivers unaware a diva is down in the next lane over…

Just landed via Telegram:

“The Nightmare Before Christmas” just means, January 1st – December 24th.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Did you know that if a unicorn and I were to race, the unicorn would likely win cause unicorns are about as real as my desire to race anything?

Making waves on Pinterest:

Keep your friends close, but your smartphone closer.

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