71 funny words quotes - Page 2 - Wordgag

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Mar 30, 2026

Why are “hemorrhoids” not called “assteroids”?

Mar 30, 2026

Words I heard most when I ran errands with my dad: “Wait in the truck.”

Mar 30, 2026

I need to stop living by the words “life is short.” It’s hurting my bank account.

Mar 30, 2026

He called me delusional, but I think he meant delicious.

Mar 29, 2026

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Mar 29, 2026

I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired.

Mar 29, 2026

Sometimes I use big words I don’t always fully understand, in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Mar 28, 2026

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Mar 28, 2026

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Mar 28, 2026

I just realized boobytrap backwards spells partyboob.

Mar 28, 2026

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

Mar 28, 2026

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

Mar 28, 2026

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Mar 28, 2026

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Mar 28, 2026

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Mar 27, 2026

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Mar 27, 2026

Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Mar 27, 2026

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Mar 27, 2026

Hawk o the mornin tuah

Mar 27, 2026

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Mar 27, 2026

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Mar 27, 2026

Two words have helped me open a lot of doors in my life. Push and Pull.

Mar 27, 2026

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

Mar 27, 2026

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Mar 26, 2026

I am thick and tired.

Mar 26, 2026

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Mar 26, 2026

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

Mar 26, 2026

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Mar 26, 2026

Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.

Mar 26, 2026

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Mar 26, 2026