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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡· has shared:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡³ has viewed:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡« has shared:

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡΅ has copied:

Trying to make sense of other people’s actions will drive you to insanity.

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡― has viewed:

Anyone want to fall in love and split rent?

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬ has copied:

If we all club together we could raise enough money to buy Monday and have it destroyed.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ύ has downloaded:

Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¬ has downloaded:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡¬ has shared:

The only warning I take seriously these days is when my cell phone battery is low.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,673

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Going viral on Reddit:

Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

Going viral on Threads:

Slowly I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Sorry, can’t. Waiting for my clothes to come back into style again.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Seen just now on Reddit:

It’s so foggy outside. Y’all gotta stop vaping.

Trending via Threads:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The secret to my success is everywhere I go I wear a shirt that says STAFF on the back.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Men playing hard to get when they’re already hard to want, is so funny to me.

Spotted on Reddit:

It turns out, as you get older, you don’t actually figure anything out; you just don’t have any energy to care anymore.

Making waves on TikTok:

Love it when my brain is like, β€œYou forgot something,” and then refuses to elaborate.

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

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I was living in the moment until I was evicted.
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Commentary:
Living in the moment might be rent-free, but apparently not for long! πŸ˜‚πŸ πŸšͺ

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Slack this month:

Do you think Yoda says β€œ7-6” instead?

84 shares on Facebook this month:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

52 shares on Threads this month:

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

Was in a bookshop and asked a worker if he could recommend books to me. He said, ‘Sure, they’re great.’

79 shares on Threads this month:

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Adulthood is just saying β€œit is what it is,” and then crying in your car to a song from 2012.

80 shares on X this month:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Jeans have the tendency of looking neat when you’re about to wash them.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

68 shares on Threads this month:

Meow means woof in cat.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

19 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

5 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Traded my Fitbit in for a Sitbit.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,598

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has shared:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

To be clear, when I said I was looking for “growth,” I meant in salary, not in workload and stress levels.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡² has copied:

Instagram is literally just screenshots of Twitter.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡© has viewed:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has shared:

So many true crime podcasts are just like β€œa young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

Mornings would be fine if they started later.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡© has copied:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡­ has shared:

Be warned: I’m bored. This could get dangerous.

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just landed via WeChat:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Spotted on Instagram:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Autumn and winter are coming. The time when I make myself tea and always forget that I’ve made myself tea.

Going viral on Slack:

Livin’ la vida vodka!

Shared recently on Reddit:

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

Making waves on Discord:

Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Seen just now on Threads:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

Breaking via Slack:

I always have a bad connection in my head when someone tries to explain a card or board game to me.

Spotted on Telegram:

Disliking me is valid. I probably confronted you on your poor behavior, while everyone else just accepted it.

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