Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I am officially at the age where old people think I am young and young people think I am old.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Save money by accidentally forgetting your wallet at home. Follow me for more financial tips and tricks.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” is my favorite story about how everyone treats you like shit until they need something from you.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,392

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

Just shared via Telegram:

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Just landed via Telegram:

I love when someone texts “hey,” like I’m supposed to solve the rest.

Just landed via Telegram:

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My most boomer belief is that you can often get a malfunctioning appliance to work again by slapping it.

Shared recently on Twitch:

If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it?

Spotted on X:

Half the world is mentally ill. The other half is to blame.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

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Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Lil Labubu is getting a first-class upgrade from the crying queue to the shopping spree aisle! 🛍️✈️😆

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on YouTube this month:

If you compliment me, my glasses fog up.

16 shares on Slack this month:

All I want I for Christmas is to go to the mall in 1986.

18 shares on Slack this month:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

“Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet…” Shall I tell you more about myself?

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Never trust someone who can eat 24/7 but is still skinny.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

The masculine urge to hitch your pants up after making a minor decision.

81 shares on Facebook this month:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it like five or six times. You know, just to be sure.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Warning: not watching the news may lead to a heightened sense of joy, security, and optimism.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,248

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

It’s cool how seeing a less flattering photo of an attractive friend does not change my perception of them at all, but seeing one of myself makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Kettlebells? I thought you said kettle chips.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I really miss kissing. I hope next year favors my lips.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

No, babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

My handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m so sick of TV shows and movies where there are no likable characters. I don’t need to spend an hour with people I hate, I already have my life.

Spotted on Slack:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Going viral on Twitch:

I don’t think I’d get married again, but I would like to annoy someone until one of us is dead.

Making waves on YouTube:

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Y’all ever feel like your mouth is stupid but your mind is smart? Like you’re intelligent but you can’t express it when you’re speaking? It’s so frustrating.

Making waves on Twitch:

Who needs a dominatrix when you can be beaten up by an automatically retracting vacuum cleaner cable?

Trending via Reddit:

If you like water, you already like 72% of me.

Freshly posted on X:

About to form my very first opinion.

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