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Commentary:
"Who needs a gym membership when you have a friend like this? 🤪💪 Let the insanity begin – fitness boot camp or just a wild ride, you decide! 🏋️‍♂️😜 #CertifiedCrazyTrainer"

activity, crazy, friendship, fun, hang, hang out, humor, me, train

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.

1 week ago

anything, communication, humor, policy, privacy, privacy policy, sarcasm, technology, tell, update, us, why
It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

3 weeks ago

diet, eat, eating, fitness, food, health, humor, i, just, less, simple, simplicity, want, weigh, weight
If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

2 weeks ago

convenience, force, humor, i, ID, Jedi, just, laziness, open, pistachio, sci-fi, snack, Star Wars
On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

2 weeks ago

adventure, anything, fantasy, humor, journey, Mordor, need, nerd, quest
Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

2 weeks ago

40, activity, birthday, birthday party, celebration, depot, fun, fun activity, home, Home Depot, humor, men, over, over 40, party, should, store, stores
Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

3 weeks ago

coolness, death, fashion, freeze, humor, styling, teenager

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

87 shares on Twitch this month:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

14 shares on Instagram this month:

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

76 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

52 shares on YouTube this month:

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m just trying to have a nice time despite knowing facts and information.

13 shares on Threads this month:

Cashews are my favorite because they’re salty and hunched over just like me.

65 shares on Instagram this month:

You will see blonder children than you would ever think possible at expensive ice cream parlours.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

The world would be a much nicer place if we just turn off the news.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

(flirting) You’ll be the death of me.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

I could have done without braces back then. What’s the point of having perfect teeth if I have no reason to smile?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

I wanted to study psychology, but I have more potential as a patient, to be honest.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

McDonald’s only giving me 9 Chicken Nuggets instead of 10 is how my villain origin story began.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Going viral on Telegram:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Spotted on Threads:

Note: Press the button on the elevator as often as possible to activate the secret express function and speed up the thing.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

Freshly posted on Discord:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

Going bananas on TikTok:

My brain is on airplane mode today.

Breaking via Messenger:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Shared recently on Discord:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Live now on Snapchat:

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

Broadcasted on Slack:

The cool thing about Twitter is you’re never the craziest one.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You don’t have to be crazy to hang out with me. I’ll train you.

Keep the laugh going 😂

“Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Social Media Stars ⭐

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