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Commentary:
"Finally, find your perfect match and conspira-'see' together on a whole new level! 👁️🔍 Who knew uncovering the truth could be so romantic? Swipe right for chemtrails, left for lizard people! 🦎💕 #TrueLoveOrIlluminati"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

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2 months ago

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The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

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5 months ago

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The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

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2 months ago

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One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

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2 months ago

comfort, cool, day, fashion, favorite, grocery, grocery store, humor, next, pants, realization, realize, store, sweatpants
Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

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2 months ago

avoidance, cardio, course, exercise, fitness, humor, i, problems, running
If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

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2 months ago

challenge, clever, difficult, humor, i, math, me, online, post, problem, problems, solve, statistic, too

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Twitch this month:

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

89 shares on X this month:

When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

30 shares on Telegram this month:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.”

26 shares on X this month:

If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

All I’m saying is that at first I am shy and then I become a podcast.

45 shares on X this month:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Anyone know how to get an air guitar out of a vacuum?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

They should make a Wikipedia for normal people. I should be able to google my barista.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Just call me Mother Nature because I can go from hot to cold in a 24-hour period, too.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Making waves on Twitch:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Trending via WeChat:

Me: Hello, darkness, my old friend. Darkness: I have a boyfriend.

Spotted on Discord:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Spotted on YouTube:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Going viral on Instagram:

You are the wind beneath my overly sensitive, motion-activated floodlight.

Just landed via Telegram:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Just shared via Messenger:

I don’t understand the desire to rock climb. We have stairs for that now. Problem solved.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The sexual tension between my tendency to do something stupid and my resolve not to.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨