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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

“Well, at least tomorrow is Friday.” -Me, having a bad Wednesday that’s about to get even worse.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

I need a vaccine against overthinking.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,325

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Just once I’d like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear “Monday has been cancelled,” and then go back to sleep.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If you have a pure heart, you can make pretty much any non-baking meal off just vibes and intuition.

Breaking via Instagram:

Alcohol and eye contact is a deadly combo.

Just shared via YouTube:

I miss getting my misinformation from less places.

Just landed via YouTube:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Vegan zombies be like: GRAINS!

Spotted on Pinterest:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

6 days ago

Funny Quotes

Clever and playful quote encouraging creativity and gossip, guaranteed to make you smile.

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Commentary:
Spice it up or it never happened! 😜💥🕵️‍♀️

advice, boring, create, creativity, fun, gossip, hear, humor, personality, social

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58 shares on YouTube this month:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

80 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Studies show people who like my posts are happier, smarter, and better looking than those who don’t.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

(Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Let’s ruin each other’s sleep schedules and call it romance.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

14 shares on Threads this month:

What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?

29 shares on Reddit this month:

I just feel like we shouldn’t have a new year until we get this one right.

49 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Some people are like clouds. When they go away it’s much better.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I took the road less traveled because I was hoping not to run into anyone I know along the way.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

It is not without reason that all telescopes searching for intelligent life are pointed away from Earth.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Can’t wait for this AI bubble to pop so we can all go back to normal, just like how the internet completely disappeared after the dot-com bubble popped.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Every grocery store becomes an escape room if you see someone you know.

Going bananas on Facebook:

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

Just shared via Threads:

Waving at the end of every Zoom call like it’s the 1800s and a big steamship is leaving the harbor.

Trending via YouTube:

If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

Just shared via Twitch:

I let my girl wear whatever because you’re staring, and I’m hittin’ that.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Seen just now on Facebook:

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Live now on WeChat:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

Seen just now on TikTok:

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

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Activity Log ✨

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

As a kid, I didn’t understand the subtext of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’ at all. I thought Mommy was cheating.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

As a kid, I didn’t understand the subtext of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’ at all. I thought Mommy was cheating.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨