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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

You now have the chance to be the first person to send me nudes.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ί has bookmarked:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡· has shared:

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡° has viewed:

Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

Don’t cry because it’s over. Cry because you have an extra hour to think about it.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡» has downloaded:

Not pretty enough for Instagram, not funny enough for Twitter. Welcome to WhatsApp status.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡ͺ has bookmarked:

I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

217 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,486

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,486

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,489

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Snapchat:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Nobody should be blowing up Teslas. If you just wait a bit, they’ll probably do it by themselves.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Just shared via X:

A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Live now on Slack:

Being in a rich person’s house is so stressful. Like, why am I struggling to find the trash?

Live now on LinkedIn:

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

Trending via Instagram:

PiΓ±atas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Just shared via WeChat:

Accidentally said I was on a diet instead of in a calorie deficit, and now everyone knows I’m from the 1900s.

Making waves on Reddit:

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

Funny adjustment quotes

Funny adjustment quotes bring a smile when life throws curveballs πŸ˜„πŸ”„ Whether it’s adapting to new routines or unexpected changes, a little humor goes a long way! πŸ˜‚βœ¨ Get ready to lighten the mood and embrace those twists with laughter and wit. Because sometimes, the best way to handle adjustments is with a good chuckle and a fresh perspective! πŸŽ‰πŸ€ͺ #StayPositive #KeepLaughing

New funny adjustment quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny adjustment quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Social Media Stars ⭐

35 shares on Twitch this month:

That moment when you realize β€œyeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

52 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Social media is mental suicide.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not being able to teleport is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

25 shares on Messenger this month:

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

28 shares on Threads this month:

So far, every Miss Universe winner has been from Earth.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

Sorry I can’t carpool to work. That’s the time I use to angry scream.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

Are you even a parent if you’ve never carried your child out of a store sideways like a surfboard?

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Me, on New Year’s Eve: I think instead of kissing at midnight, I’m just going to go outside and scream.

18 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I hate checking my bank account after having a good time.

18 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

16 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Not commenting on your girl’s stuff is weird. I want my man barking in my comments.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

217 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,486

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,486

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,486

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

Unfortunately for the haters, I will continue to keep being me.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡­ has copied:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡­ has copied:

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40s! You’re gonna need several doctors, no matter how many apples.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize, I honestly did not think you could read.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡· has shared:

When you realize a 9 to 5 is actually an 8 to 7, since you cannot teleport to work.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡· has shared:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Broadcasted on Discord:

Sadly, I do my best proofreading after I hit “send.

Just landed via WeChat:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Making waves on WeChat:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Trending via Discord:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Trending via Messenger:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Going bananas on Discord:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

Making waves on Instagram:

The word β€˜stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan β€˜Dennis’? We could be saying, β€œI dennis Beyonce.”

Live now on Discord:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

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